Posts Tagged ‘The Transience of Youth’

TransienceOriginal

 

Okay, by “stuff” I mean one book for an extremely limited time. My ticket on the Crazy Train (last stop, Indianapolis) hasn’t officially been punched yet. It’s still a hanging chad. Coincidentally, if you got that last reference, you might be interested in getting this book. Have I mentioned it’s soon to be free? Detailed details follow:

Coming this mid-week, mid-week, mid-week! A creature never before seen on God’s green Earth! A mutant of epic proportions! Consider, if you can, a Kindle ebook consisting of 50% romantic comedy, 50% contemplation of death, and 50% bathroom humor written 110% by a writer who sucks egregiously at math! The horror…And the romantic comedy…And the apologies for the Yogi Berra rip-off…

So here’s the deal. Between the dates of the completely arbitrary dates of July 21-July 23, 2015,The Transience of Youth will be wholly free. It’s yours for the price of a nothing. A seven- or eight-chapter preview is available for your reading pleasure or disgust at all times, but here are a few nuggets from later on in the tale:

Though he was used to rejection in both his personal and quasi-professional lives—from women, from publishers, from literary agents—this one hurt. He and Janice had much in common, or so he’d thought. They were both intelligent and ambitious, and they were more than compatible in the bedroom. They enjoyed the same movies, the same quiet restaurants, and the same love for baseball, crossword puzzles, and crude animated sitcoms. Then what the hell happened? Steve wondered.

****

“I’m a victim of youthism.”

****

“Oh, you’re worried about your personal safety?” Betsy asked, her tone dripping with spurious sympathy. “Mr. Dugan on Mayflower Street was probably concerned about his safety when he served this great nation in World War II. Even more concerned, I imagine, when a German Panzer shell exploded next to him, killing half his squad and rendering his legs forever useless.” She continued, color rising in her face. “And sweet old Ms. Gibson on Downing Lane? I’m sure she didn’t feel quite at home when she and her sister were beaten nearly to death in front of an Alabama church because their skin color didn’t match that of the locals.” Betsy picked a pair of scissors off her desk and pointed their business end at Steve. “If you think for the briefest second you have earned the right to live among people as fine and worthy as them, you are utterly, hopelessly, wrong.”

“Ms. Rogan, I’m just as entitled to—”

“Entitled? Entitled?”

****

“Oh, wah. Cry me a river. The lights go out for a couple of days and you’re ready to throw yourself in front of a freight train? You need to toughen up, son. Things aren’t so bad.”

“It’s just…disappointing. I thought moving here would change everything.“

“There’s no magic wand, kid. You can change your surroundings all you want, but you can’t change what’s in here.” George tapped his temple. “You’re stuck with it.”

****

Steve took a step toward Sarah and grazed her hand with one trembling finger. To his surprise, she inched forward and curled her pinkie around his. She stood close enough for Steve to feel the heat radiating off her body. He licked his lips, swallowed loudly and asked, “Do you have enough time to talk for a while?”

Then some other stuff happens.

Again, free! From July 21st ’til July 23nd. Time zones may vary.

 

 

 

I always had a problem with writers who cast their main characters in the role of Author. Even when I was a kid and my writing experience was limited to filling in those maddeningly tiny bubbles on the Scantron sheet of the middle school exam du jour, I balked at risking my time (but not my money; Mom’s bookshelf and the ol’ library card made books free) on any novel beginning with the phrase, “Aspiring novelist Bob Smith awoke and… .” I just instantly knew I wouldn’t be able to relate. So I’d tighten the Velcro on my Zips, mosey on over to the non-fiction section and check out yet another baseball book. Usually something with lots of black-and-white photos in it.

Tastes change, of course. I eventually swapped my Zips for Vans and my picture-laden baseball books for ones heavier on the text. “Choose Your Own Adventure” paperbacks were all the rage right around that time, and I indulged in my share of those, too (and just like you, I cheated). Somewhere between the time I realized not all baseball players are heroes and not all girls are gross, I discovered the (up to that point) collected works of one Stephen King.

[Insert lightbulb-over-head emoji here.]

A lot of Mr. King’s main characters are writers. A lot of them. And for the first time in my life, I connected the author with the work. Ya see, it turns out that books and short stories and essays and Constitutions and technical manuals and graffitied walls are not (I repeat, not) singularities that wink into existence the second someone opens a book cover or a restroom stall. It just so happens that (most) writers of everything from epic poetry to corporate tweets pour their hearts (and the rest of themselves) into their craft. Sadly, it took me about halfway into my second (chronologically, anyway) novel to realize that.

The Transience of Youth (working title, Summer — that still cracks me up) ended up being a pseudo-quasi-at-arm’s-length semi-autobiographical account of what made me a writer. Coincidentally, the main character is a writer. So I formally apologize to every author of writer-driven fiction whose work I shunned in my adolescence. I just didn’t get it.

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Well, it’s that time of the month again.

Obviously, I’m talking about the last gasp of a 28-, 30-, or 31- (okay, sometimes 29-) day chunk of time conveniently standardized by the good folks at Gregorian, Inc. lo these many years ago. June is preparing to become July, and I’m preparing to take a financial hit in exchange for a couple eleventh-hour sales before this sixth month of the year comes to a close. In that spirit, I’m offering a dollar off each of my offerings at Smashwords.

“Only a dollar?” you ask.

“Yes,” I say. “But a dollar equals 25%-33% off when you translate it into math and stuff.”

“My hero!”

Coupon codes and links below:

 

A WORLD GONE GRAY COMPLETED DESIGN200x300px Regular price $3.99. Use coupon code ZL78Q.

 

TransienceOriginal Regular price $2.99. Use coupon code YM84F.

 

LIKE LIFE ITSELF COMPLETED DESIGN200x300px Regular price $2.99. Use coupon code VC86J.

 

SIGNAL FIRE COMPLETED DESIGN_thumbnail Regular price $2.99. Use coupon code AB26F.

 

Since I’m a patriotic sort, all coupons are valid through July 4, 2014. That’s almost an entire week of savings! Enjoy.

 

A WORLD GONE GRAY COMPLETED DESIGN200x300pxLIKE LIFE ITSELF COMPLETED DESIGN200x300pxSIGNAL FIRE COMPLETED DESIGN_thumbnailTransienceOriginal

I really don’t put much thought into the timing of my…well…anything. When it comes to book releases, however, I try to make them coincide with something resembling sense. I released my debut novel, A World Gone Gray,  in mid-November 2013, just ahead of the Christmas feeding frenzy. Since it initially fared well, I released Like Life Itself a week or so later.  I published Signal Fire in March, hoping it might end up on some discerning reader’s post-Winter TBR list. Most recently, I released The Transience of Youth last week. It’s a Summer-y Rom-Com type of thing, and I thought a mid-June release might suit it.

Turns out I’m one-for-four. A World Gone Gray continues to be my most consistent seller. It’s outsold the rest of the bunch about five-to-one. Combined. Which raises the question: Why? Is it the cover? The description? The content? What makes five times as many readers choose AWGG over the rest of my humble offerings?

Here’s the honest answer: I have no friggin’ idea. AWGG is the first book I ever completed. It has its moments, I think, but it ain’t no Faulkner. It’s my baby and I’m oh-so-close to it, but I fail to see why it beasts the rest of my books. The Transience of Youth (working title: Summer. Ha!) is my Number Two novel. Signal Fire came third, and my yet-to-be-released political comedy is number the fourth. Ideally, a writer improves as time marches on; more experience yields better work, and all that. But it seems I blew my load (so to speak) way back in November of 2013. Again, why?

Again, I have no bloody idea. I write stuff, I upload it to the Interwebs, and stuff happens. After that, your guess is as good as mine. If anyone can elaborate, I’ll gladly give you $1 (American), and a high-five.

And since I’m a glutton for punishment, I’m releasing my political comedy, I Like Mike, in September or so, just ahead of the US mid-term elections. I’m sure that’ll work out just fine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TransienceOriginal

Yeah, I never expected to see a couple making out on one of my book covers, either.

Anyone who’s familiar with my previous work knows I tend to gravitate toward the dark side in my writing. Not full-on Voltaire or Nietzsche dark, but I do have my reservations regarding the human race. As a full-blooded human being myself, I feel I’m qualified to comment on such things. But I digress. As per usual.

My timeline for the release of The Transience of Youth accelerated a couple days ago when I discovered the perfect cover for it at The Cover Collection. It just so happens that the male lead in my humble tome is a young man working at a Pick-a-Part-type automobile graveyard in a desolate region of California. He’s also pursuing a young woman (Sarah) who looks a whole lot like the one featured above. Also, cars and aging are major themes throughout the story. So I guess I’m trying to say the cover fits.

Hey, B.P. What’s your new book really about?

Glad you asked, kid. Glad you asked. The Transience of Youth concerns the trials and tribulations of aspiring writer Steven Hansen. It seems he’s been unlucky in both love and living arrangements for the vast majority of his life. In an attempt to change this, he exploits a loophole in California’s legal code and finagles his way into a 55+ senior community. Shunned at first (and targeted by the community’s vengeful leasing agent [and its landscaping crew]), Steve reluctantly befriends bitter octogenarian George, former big-time Hollywood screenwriter and current curmudgeon. With George and Sarah’s help, Steve eventually realizes he may not have quite earned the right to live in the idyllic home of his dreams.

Hey, B.P., when is The Transience of Youth going to be available?

If the Writing Gods deem it so, June 13th, 2014. Yes, I realize it’s a Friday and am aware of all the bad stuff associated with that date. That said, I hope Jason Voorhes buys a million copies.