Frankly, Say Relapse

Posted: May 24, 2014 in Self-publishing
Tags: , , , ,


And no, I refuse to apologize for that pun-tastic ’80s reference of a blog title.

In a fairly recent post, I acknowledged my checkoholism and vowed to take a gander at my book sales but twice monthly. Habitual checking of sales, experts claim, can lead to devastating bouts of self-doubt, depression, and restless legs syndrome. Shockingly enough, I failed in my attempt to rein in my checking. The results were predictable โ€” my barely-there sales made me kick at the dirt, mutter “Aww, shucks,” and officially condemn myself as the worst writer in this universe or any other. How did that influence my writer’s block, you ask? Not positively.

At the risk of perpetuating the (completely true) stereotype of the “tortured writer,” I can read a passage or two from either a work in progress or a work that’s fading in the rear view mirror one day and be proud of the words I’ve wrought. Then I can wake up the next day, skim over the same damn words, and wonder why the hell I even bothered. So I guess I’m my own best and worst critic. Sounds like grounds for forty-eight hours’ worth of involuntary psych evaluations. Gotta protect the public from substandard fiction now, don’t we? But I digress. As per usual.

But a funny thing happened on the way to the loony bin. Last night (technically, this morning) I took a look at the available samples of my books on Amazon and Smashwords for the first time in months. Did I obsess over the minor changes in verbiage and tone 2014 me would have made if he had access to a time machine and could tell 2010 me about them? Hell, yes. Did I think, for the first time in months, that my work is viable (maybe even “good”), and that maybe I’m not completely wasting my time on this writin’ thing? Yes, minus the hell.

And so it goes. I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and I know that one day people will read me. For the first time in a long time, thing’s are lookin’ up!*

*-Opinion subject to change tomorrow when my brain chemistry is completely different.


  1. Melinda says:

    I hear you. I often think there is too much information available now. Better to wait for the monthly sales statement, but I break down too ๐Ÿ™‚

    • bpbroome says:

      You’re right about the instant availability of information. I’m the sort of person who stands in front of the microwave and tells it to hurry up, already. Thankfully, I’m down to checking sales once every two or three days now. So there’s hope for me yet ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. purehaiku says:

    that some people have read your book is positive! aim for steady (even if slow) rising book sales – that’s how I’m approaching this publishing game…

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